Canadian Personal Finance Blog

Michael James talked about found money yesterday and the joy of paying off bills with found money, and how we should not squander this found wealth, and really use it to create happiness in the future by paying off debt now. I think this is a sensible approach to found money, but it made me think about another post I did a while ago, which was how couples deal with money.

Many times found money can cause a great deal of consternation between spouses because each have their own idea of what the best thing is to do with found money.

I think this is natural, as with most every subject possible spouses are going to have their own ideas, but the problem arises when the two ideas are contradictory or even orthogonal to each other.

Say Mary and Bob get $10,000.00 in found money from an inheritance. Mary thinks she’d like to go on a nice vacation with the family because the family has never really been on a vacation, however, Bob thinks that putting that money on their Mortgage (thus shortening it’s term by 5 years), is the right answer.

Reading this, it sounds like an easy enough “problem” to deal with, both folks want to do what they think is best with the money, but the problem now is you have is a simple difference of opinion. The problem I have seen in my life and from other folks I know is that this is not a simple problem, because:

• There is no wrong answer (or right answer)
• Both spouses have voiced their opinion, and thus feel they have the right answer.
• Money and money management is a divisive factor in many relationships

Is there a Solution?

Only if both parties are willing to compromise, or one is willing to lose (i.e. typical Prisoner’s Dilemma issue). Wikipedia’s explanation of the Prisoner’s Dilemma is:

Two prisoners (the players) during the interrogation each have a choice: whether to betray the other one, and thus to decrease his own jail time by, for example, 1 month (as a compensation for the cooperation), while increasing the jail time for the other by, for example, 10 years, or to stay silent. Each of the prisoners is only interested in receiving the least possible sentence. It shall be assumed that the prisoners make their choices (to betray or to stay silent) simultaneously, and they know for sure that their choice cannot affect the choice of the other one.

All right I am stretching this (feel free to leave a comment), but the need to compromise and find the best solution for the couple is not always obvious to either spouse, and sometimes they feel it is not in their best interest (they got their way the last time, so I want my way this time). Sound familiar to any of my readers? Never happened to you?

Resolution?

I have no canned simple answer for this one, because as I keep saying, Money is a strange and divisive thing in a relationship, especially if the spouses do not agree in terms of money and how to use it.

What needs to be done is have clear lines of communication and rational discussions between the spouses about what they want to do, and a decision made that doesn’t cause either to feel that they have “lost” in this decision. Sounds easy doesn’t it ?

Think this is a simple thing to resolve? You and your spouse never have these issues? Then you are either very lucky (or very naive).

The French President Nicolas Sarkozy is asking that very question. How can the economic measures done include the relative happiness of the populous in the economic growth ?

Interesting question but who cares? If there is economic growth the relative happiness of any single worker has very little to do with any of this, that is the nature of the free market system. I am not saying that employers and governments should not care about happiness of workers in their companies or their countries, what I am saying, is: They don’t. The only time the relative happiness of employees or workers ever comes into play is when there is a scarcity of those employees and then the Employers must then make sure their employees are happy (to retain them).

Case in Point

Over my thirty years working various jobs my best examples of what makes people happy is simply whether they get good pay raises,whether their direct boss or the people they work with are good to work with, and whether they enjoy their direct job. I have been lucky in that most of my bosses have been reasonable folk and the folk I work with the same, so my only “happiness” monitor was and is money.

How do I make more money? I really don’t know. Years when I think I have been effective, I have had little or no pay raise, years where I feel I have failed I have been rewarded highly (and vice versa). If someone could train me in how to increase my Happiness by increasing my income, I’d be even happier. If anyone cares to comment on getting a raise, I am interested in hearing your Happiness and Pay Raise stories.

Anecdote

Two years in a row I went into my “pay adjustment” discussions with my boss expecting raises and both times I got not much:

• The first year my company had not done very well and the stock had dropped a fair amount and the statement I got from my boss at the time was, “How can you expect a raise look at the stock price?“
• The next year, the same boss and I went into our adjust meeting, the stock had rebounded the company was doing much better and when I asked about why my raise was about the same as the previous lean year, given the stock price had rebounded, I got the statement, “The Stock Price, has nothing to do with your relative pay raise“.

Bosses say the darndest things don’t they?

Looking over at Stats Canada this week, you can see that they have published a report on the Income of Individuals for 2005. The article says:

The median total income of individuals amounted to $25,400 in 2005, up 1.9% from 2004 after adjusting for inflation. This is the largest annual increase in median total income of individuals since 2001. The median is the point where one half of incomes are higher and the other half are lower.

This is one of those, good news, and head scratching news. The good news is that the median total income has gone up by 1.9% so that is a good thing (it would be bad if it had gone down). The head scratcher part of it, is the question of just who is living on this income level?

The median employment income is a little higher at $26,300, but that again seems pretty darn low.

If you have a couple that together are making $52,600 that is a bit better, but again, that seems low.

Now let us bear in mind what the mathematical term Median actually means. Do not confuse Median for Mean or Arithmetic Average , which is:

Pardon me? Add all your numbers up and then divide it by the total number of numbers you added. This article does not mention Mean or Average income, it talks about Median.

What is Median?

Now THAT looks complicated doesn’t it? OK, what Median is, simply is the middle value in a list of numbers. This middle number may be nowhere near the average of all of the numbers, so this Median means half of all Canadians either make or earn less than $25,400.00 and half earn more than that.

What does this number mean, in my opinion is that the gap between the “haves” and “have nots” is widening at an alarming rate these days.