My Dad passed away a few years ago, and he was never really “on board” with the whole idea of folks fussing about him on a specific day. He did make my brothers and I do something about Father’s Day but only because he knew my Mother would have been upset (his favorite expression was always, “Don’t upset your mother”), and that is really what your Father wants, is for your Mother to be happy (don’t think I am breaking any masonic code with that truth).
If I was your Father what would I want from you? I think it’s pretty darn simple, it’s a short list of simple things you can do that will make your Dad and me happy:
Be better than us. Your Dad may be a hero to you, but your goal in life is to be better than him, that way Dads (as a species) keep getting better. You want to show your Father something, be better than him and that will make him happy (we are complicated beings, we Fathers).
- Be happy. For God’s sake that is what your parents in general want, but Dads in specific. All Fathers want their family to be happy, because when they aren’t happy, we have to talk about things and discuss things (which detracts from our ability to snooze, watch sports and do things we want to do). Your Dad wants you to be happy.
- Don’t eat the big piece of chicken. OK I stole that one from Chris Rock, but it’s true, if you are in your Father’s house, show some respect, let him have the big piece of chicken, and maybe thank him for what he has done for you (but don’t get all emotional or loud about it, your Dad is OK with, “Thanks Dad“, not some frigging singing card). Conversely your Father should show you respect in your house as well (yes respect is a two-way street).
Your Father wants to know that whatever he taught you (by act, deed or statement), has prepared (or is preparing) you for life, because we don’t want you moving back in with us. Your parents do their best to help you out, but eventually they should be allowed to live their lives too (in most cases, but we will protect our kids who need protection, as well).
Bring your Dad a beer, say “Thanks Dad“, and make sure your Mother is happy and your Dad will be happy. Oh and for the young ladies out there, tell your boyfriends/husbands to shut up during the football games, your Dad doesn’t really want to hear their opinions either (he just wants to watch the damn game).