Financial Shock Collar

in Credit Cards, Debts, Humor

After yesterday’s epiphany of the Financial GPS, I think I have streamlined the concept and gone to exactly what might be needed with today’s chronic over spender, the Financial Shock Collar.

This device, will look like a fashionable necklace for the ladies or simply a gold chain around the neck for men, and when it is activated 10,000 volts are instantly activated from a small power source (at milli-amperage levels) causing sudden and excruciating pain for its’ wearers, until they stop the spending which activated the collar (yes I borrowed this idea from a Star Trek episode, but aren’t all the best ideas from Star Trek?).



Is this a severe and dangerous tool to use? You are darn right that this is a ludicrously severe tool, but given some folks ability to completely lose their minds when it comes to:

  • Financial Decision
  • Overspending
  • Use of money they don’t have
  • Live now pay later thinking

This may be a useful “last hope” type of device.

Self-Destructing Debit/Credit Card

Don’t like my shock collar idea? A much less severe idea (depending on how you look at it) would be the self-destructing debit/credit card. Given most new cards come with a great deal of “smart card” technologies this one may be simpler to implement (and much more fun to watch).

The concept is quite simple, if the consumer attempts to use the card by either swiping it or “tapping” it, the card receives a simple message destruct and the card emits a high pitched alarm sound and 5 seconds later the card explodes, with a small charge embedded in it, when it was manufactured.

This makes the whole scenario of the credit card company rejecting a purchase and asking the vendor to seize the card a much simpler scenario, and it makes stolen cards that much more lethal for the thieves as well. If a card is stolen, it will automatically self-destruct when it gets near ANY credit card terminal.

Sure, there will be occasional glitches where cards may self-destruct without warning, but those small glitches and maiming of their owners are assumable risks for those who wish to have the privilege of carrying a credit card.

An added side-effect might be less people wanting to carry around credit cards with them, for fear of the occasional random self-destruction as well. Think of someone carrying around 6-8 credit cards, what might happen if one goes off accidentally? The chain-effect might well be complete destruction of the owner.

More interesting new “outside of the box” (unless the box is a coffin) ideas for financial safety may come, as I think of them.

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{ 2 comments… add one }
  • 2Hirondelles February 2, 2010, 9:11 AM

    ROFLMAO…fwded to my family member who is guilty of such behaviours at times.

    • bigcajunman February 2, 2010, 9:17 AM

      If we use this kind of training system for dogs, surely it will work with overspenders?


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