Sometimes I am not the Better Man
Every year my alma mater calls me and asks for me to donate money to them, to help keep it one of the leading schools in Canada. Most years I will give some small amount as I feel a slight obligation to help out the school, given the degree that I paid for and earned there has helped me a great deal in finding jobs and gave me great experience in the co-op program.
This seems to have all changed this year, with my daughter applying to my Alma Mater, in a program which she is very keen to work in (Kinesiology).
I read my Alumni newsletter and saw that this school will actually send out over 24,000 acceptance letters to prospective new undergrads, so that they can actually get a freshman class of about 6,000 students, so I thought her chances were good, however, I was mistaken.
We waited, a good long time and finally she received a polite note saying that her application for the program had been denied, but they said she did have acceptance in a somewhat similar program (Recreation & Leisure studies). I think this upset my daughter, because I think she wanted to attend her Dad’s old school (she has seen the campus a few times, and has heard my many stories of the fun I had at the school), and if I am being honest, I was disappointed as well.
My guess is that the program she applied to does not have a large undergrad class (I think it is around 200 or so kids), and the competition for these spots is very hard fought.
My daughter has been accepted at another fine school in the Maritimes in Wolfville, and I hope that she has as much fun getting a degree and going to University as I did.
This all being said, I have this nagging feeling that the next time a cheerful undergrad calls from Kitchener’s finest University, I may not be as polite and as giving as I have previously been. I probably will not explain to the caller my reasons why I will decline to give my former school money, because they are not who I have issues with.
Is this being petty and childish on my part yes, very much so. Did my daughter not get in due to her not having sufficient marks to get in to the program yes, I think that may be the case. Is this a valid reason not to support my former school financially? Yes, because it is my money.
Was this a rant, or me hopping on to my own little soapbox to decry something that upsets me? Guilty as charged. I do however point out that giving money to the countless charities that hound me for my hard earned money, is a hard fought competition, and maybe in this situation my Alma Mater has failed to live up to my high standards as well (yes, another childish comment by me).
Feel free to comment about how I should be the better person, as I have been quite “preachy” in other areas, so I am ready to take my dressing down like a man (another interesting turn of phrase).
My parent’s alma mater didn’t let me into the program I wanted either. Where I ended up going and what I ended up doing instead was an amazing experience. I know it’s a disappointment now, but someday you and your daughter may be thankful for that rejection letter.
@Big Cajun wife — trust me, there’s no green space left! I should note, however, that it is possible to specify to which faculty your donation goes. I feel the same way you do about donating to the university, but I often wonder if more arts grads donated maybe the arts faculty would have more money?