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Resolutions for 2012

In preparation for 2012, I started writing down the things that I’d like to accomplish for the coming year, and I was diligently scribing and wracking my memory for ideas, and making up goals for myself and such, when I remembered that I had done this pretty much every year for a long time. I have obsessively written things down, with goals and stretches, on how I was going to make myself a better person, and make my life better, but at the end of it all, I realized the best way to do this kind of self-improvement exercise.

This methodology may not be for everyone as it takes a very high degree of self-control and self-confidence to do this, so if you want to try this concept, please keep in mind it may not work for you.

First type up your list of resolutions or goals, and put it in your favorite format be it Powerpoint Slides, Word Document, Google Document, or type it up on an Olivetti portable typewriter, but the actual print out is the important part of this, you must have this important list in hard copy format.

The next step is to read this list over very carefully three times so it is all fresh in your mind. Read it out loud if that helps it sink into your subconscious, and hopefully it gets into your psyche.

Once you have done this, get a box of matches, light the document on fire, throw it into your fireplace, and say out loud, “Fuck Forget this!”, and walk away from it (if you don’t have a fireplace, find somewhere safe to put the burning document once you have lit it). Go over to your computer if you still have a soft copy of the list, and delete it too.

Why would I do this? I end up doing this around July anyhow (i.e. realizing that most of the list is unattainable and very optimistic planning on my part), I am just cutting out the wasting of 7 months and all the angst and guilt associated with it.

If you want to make a better life, live it, enjoy it, and don’t worry so damn much (and for the love of Christ, stop making bloody lists to improve yourself, the best way to make a better you is to make yourself happy). Stop being a tight-assed, uptight, worry wort, and just enjoy the life you are living. No I am not saying run wild and do as you please, but you know what you need to do, you don’t need a list to torment you.

You have just read my New Years Resolution for 2012, I think I nailed it.

Feel Free to Comment

  1. sill

    That’s a hilarious and terrific article.

    Much like you, I’m keeping with my New Years Resolution from 2008 which was “To not make new years resolutions.” I’ve kept that one ever since which must be some sort of record!

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